Everyone has probably heard the saying, “I’m not one of your little friends” from a parent at some point in their life. Now that I am a parent, I can agree and disagree with what they were saying. With my first born I feel as if I grew up while also parenting him at the same time. There is an irrefutable bond created, due to the unconditional love from birth. Throughout parenthood, a bond generates and begins to feel like a friendship. Matter of fact, the definition of friendship is, a voluntary mutual relationship characterized by mutual affection, trust, support and enjoyment of each other’s company. If I’m honest, my son has experienced life with me where some friends have not. According to the definition, I would say that I am indeed a friend to them to a certain extent. There are inevitable rules and boundaries that I must implement as their parent. There is safety, love, protection and providing for them, that comes with my position. Why not create a level of comfortability, trust, and enjoyment with a human you helped create and plan to have in your life until the unfortunate end of existence. My oldest son has seen the broken version, the version that had no idea what I was doing while trying to raise him, the angry and argumentative version, the non-gentle parenting version 🫣, the single parenting version, the healing version and the list goes on. Sometimes I feel bad because my younger son gets the more healed version of me. The version that is evolving, believes in gentle parenting, operates out of wisdom, and posses a little more patience instead of carelessness and trauma. I have become to realize that I am my boys safe space where they can be their authentic self and I get the privilege to help them navigate life while granting the same grace and accountability that I would to a “friend”. As I take on this healing journey I’ve learned that in order to break generational curses, there has to be a level of vulnerability, honesty, transparency, and open communication available. My hope is that the seeds that I sow into them at this point in my life, it will harvest a more transformed and healed generation with my grandchildren and beyond. It’s hard to believe that I was trusted with the responsibility of raising two boys that unknowingly woke up the best parts of me. Malakai and King is in fact my two little friends 😁.
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